Satudary morning our ward Relief Society went on a Temple Trip to the Mesa, AZ Temple. We met at our church building at 5:30 am and drove 45 minutes to the temple. My friend Erin emailed me early in the week and suggested I go with her. Knowing full well I am NOT a morning person - she went out on a limb and said I needed to go along. I agreed and decided 5:30 am would be the best time as it wouldn't be too much time away from the family.
Friday night we hosted our babysitting co-op (15 kids for about 4 hours - until 10 pm) after which I stayed up to clean up and went to bed at 12:30 am. Usually when I have to get up early for something, I don't get much sleep - too nervous I'm going to miss it. Up at 4:30 am and I was actually ready to go when Erin came to get me.
So I was pretty tired, but suprisingly awake for me at that time of morning. I (shhhhh!) slept through most of the session, but was alert enough to know what was going on around me. It was a wonderful experience being there with sisters from my ward and to know what a great "family" I have away from my family. I'd never been to the Temple during daylight hours - we usually go at night and the Celestial room was very bright at this early time.
Many of you know, we've had a few melt downs with Lea this past week, Erin has struggled with her boy the same age and our friend Sharree is in the same boat - something about the start of school, end of free time, and completely exhausted - our kids have all revolted to any sort of parenting - in which case, there is much yelling, screaming, crying and tears. Not always by the child - at least in our house. All in all, a bad mom week for me.
As I stood in the Celestial room, taking in all the architectual detail, I decided to just let my mind go - to stop looking for inspiration on how to deal with Lea when she's melting and just listen. I thought of my parents all the way in Norway - so far from us, unable to visit AZ for 18 months. I thought of our past months travel to see family. My family means more to me than anything in the world. We are very close - even at the extended family level - we are bonded together and I love it! Then my mind cleared and I had a distinct impression of three things to do with Lea: Patience, talk with her calmly and listen. What? and the same impression was there again. My shoulders felt lighter and I relaxed as I was able to fully appreciate the guidance I had just received. I've never had one of those "Ah-ha" moments before - at least not like that. It was truly amazing and I wished so badly for my parents sisters or brothers to be there with me, but I knew I had friends to help out and a loving Heavnly Father who would help me along the way as I try to be a good mom. Yes it's not easy being a parent and He already knows that - how often have I been the difficult child for Him and my own parents..... don't answer that. :)
One more thing I remember is the overwhelming feeling that I was doing a good job, I'm a good mom, but I can do more. I can be better and to be patient. It was a tender mercy for me and I am so grateful.
The rest of the day was pretty fantastic as well. I usually wait for everything to fall apart after visiting the Temple and being on a spiritual high, but today was just about perfect for me. Jeff was home for once on a Saturday with no work obligations hanging over his head. Free from a work laptop and a cell phone that was constantly buzzing with new emails, texts and phone calls. For once in a very, VERY, VERY long time, our Saturday was a family day and I loved every minute of it.
2 comments:
Thanks for sharing. I think I enjoyed reading that as much as you did writing it. I needed that. As you shared your experience in the Temple I was quickly reminded about a personal experience as well. Most importantly reminded about how much our Heavenly Father knows us individually and loves us, as he answers our prayers.
What a wonderful experience. It reminds me that I like to remind moms, especially young moms, that they are doing a GREAT job - it's a very tough job with little ones. And as I watch moms struggle in my ward, the store, or wherever, I try to let them know what a great job they are doing as a mom...and you, without a doubt, are one AWESOME mom. Keep up the good work and follow the promptings you feel. OK - day 2 for me, sitting at the computer with tears. You're the best! Love ya!
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