My heart aches

It's been a crazy couple months. It seems like every time I turn around, there is another funeral or death someone tells me about and for individuals that I never expected to hear about.

Our friends the Johnson's baby passed away of cancer at 3 months old - 3 months!
My friend's mom (who is close the same age as my own mom - that's a couple posts down) passed away this week of Cancer as well.
A family in another ward, lost their baby (almost 2 year old) - she was left asleep in the car after church and died because the cars here get over 120 degrees when left in the sun.
Another friend had a miscarriage and was along the same due date as us. She was able to go to Switzerland to visit her parents, but my heart still hurts for her and the loss of their baby.
This was last year, but my friend/neighbor - her mom passed away too and her mother-in-law got in a SERIOUS motorcycle accident a couple weeks ago - the man she was riding with probably saved her life and died before he made it to the hospital. She is doing miraculously well.
And Sunday since I'm now in Primary - thought it was odd there was a sign up for a family in our ward for meals and babysitting, but no announcement of a new baby due any day. Come to find out later, the baby was stillborn and delivered Monday morning 8lbs 1oz, 21 inches long - a little boy. She was due in a couple days. I can't imagine how that must feel to carry that baby for so long and never be able to keep them - only memories.

When I was 8 months pregnant with Lea, my sister-in-law and brother had a baby girl Riley who only lived for a few hours. It was heart-breaking to go to the funeral and know that my baby was fine and they couldn't have their's with them. Especially because they had lost Stuart at 3 months old a year or so before. I felt guilty and maybe that's selfish to think of myself, but I really wanted my brother to have his daughter. I struggled off/on with being able to have a healthy happy child and to watch my brother and sister-in-law deal with another loss of a baby. Just didn't seem fair, for either of us. The one thing I remember that day aside from having to lead the singing, was something my brother told me. He said something like this (it's been 7 years, so I don't have it exactly) "It'll be okay. Heavenly Father had to go through the same pain of watching His son suffer and die, He knows my pain - how could I ask Him to take it away when He knows all that I feel." It was touching and enlightening.

Now I only have 3 weeks to go and I'm starting to get nervous about a lot of things, but mostly just praying to make it through the surgery without freaking out completely and to have a healthy baby. And there's a reason I don't tell anyone when we're expecting because I don't want to have to tell everyone we aren't if something were to happen during the pregnancy. So I hide it as long as I can - at this point it's too late because we're almost done, but it's for my emotional frame of mind that I keep it to myself and Jeff.

My mom won't be here because they're still on their mission in Norway until February, but I'm grateful to have sisters, mother-in-law and nieces who will be able to come help out.

I'm not sure if I'd be able to handle these (and although none have happened to me directly), situations if I didn't have the knowledge of eternal families, that these babies will be reunited with their parents and raised in righteousness. They'll be perfect and they are free from whatever pains they would have had to endure on this earth. While we are sad and wishful they could still be with us, there is great rejoicing in Heaven when these individuals meet up with their family members who are already in the Spirit world. I love you all dearly (even those who read and never comment, I believe that's called stealth reading. :)), but since I know most are family, I'm thankful for a support system. I'd be lost without a family and my "family" away from family.

More camping adventures......

We went to our ward campout last month and well it was interesting. I don't like camping. Well not the sleep in a tent, no running water, dig your own potty or bring a port-a-john, middle of the woods, watch out for bears, primitive sort of camping. It's very stressful for me because I don't like to be dirty and I'm a hovering mother..........anyone wanna go camping with me now!? :) But I went - for the children and for the husband. 7 months pregnant, sleeping in a tent......I must be insane right?! And I wasn't the only one there - Heidi Allen was in charge of the whole thing and she was 8 months prego. Difference being - she loves to camp.

Jeff asked me at one point during my sarcastic comments "Why did you come?" "Because you like it" - who can argue with that. :) It was fun, I might even go again. I don't envy Heidi and all the prep work she did. She's great! We had great food, great fun and great company.

 the site - doesn't look to sloped, but it was more than I thought it was. We did sleep on cots, but I had Abbey next to me and couldn't really move.....long night and early morning......

 An INTENSE game of Mancala

 Dinner - BBQ beef, watermelon, soda and chips - can't beat that!

 Jeff, the Chef

 the "happy" wife

LOVE CAMPFIRE FUN!!! It's the best part of camping for me. Enjoy a little "Minute to Win It, Camping Edition"

Get the rubberband off your nose, no hands, teeth or use of tongue....

 Love Adam Buck's face (far left)!!

 And Jeff......hahahaha!!! :)

 Doesn't this look like the start of something AWESOME! :) There's a video too, will add that later - you don't want to miss it!!!

Happy as can be :)
 Did I mention Lea got a hair cut and lost another tooth!? #3 tooth - she's up $3.

                       Football with Dad

 Jump rope

I love this - she's so dang cute! Trying to pack up, she climbed in to find a nice quiet spot

Off to a lake nearby...(30+ miles nearby....) and FREEZING COLD

 

The End Result: they stayed here until most of the car was unpacked and went to bed. What an exhaustingly fun trip!!! :)

Lena Robertson

 Lena is a dear friend of my mom's and our family. She worked in Primary, YW and at the Temple with my mom - they are very close. Her daughter Laurie was one of my roommates at BYU and we've been friends for years. She was receiving treatment for a growth on her neck, but was having difficulty breathing and went to have it checked out - the doctor's found lung cancer and she passed away a few days later. Doesn't seem fair for someone who has never smoked a day in her life to have lung cancer. She was one of my young women leaders and I love her dearly. She was always glad to see me when I came home to visit and she was the one other person aside from family that I wanted to visit with. She would pull me aside and give me advice on dating, marriage, children, etc - I admire her so much. She was someone I considered another mom - she was genuinely concerned for my well-being. Since I moved away, my sister and family moved into my parents ward with the Robertsons and Lena was another grandma to my sister's kids. We love you Lena, we miss you and have been blessed to have you in our lives. Much love to the Robertson family and to my dear friend Laurie who lives in Albuquerque, NM. Laurie will not be home for the funeral as she is due with baby #3 July 23rd. I hope the baby gets to enjoy Lena before he/she comes to earth. I'm not sure when this picture was taken, but she's just beautiful and aged so gracefully. Love you Lena!

(Obituary written by her husband Dave Robertson) Lena K. Davis Robertson was born at home in the little town of Hoolehua, Molokai, Hawaii on August 30, 1938. She was the sixth of seven children born to William H.K.Davis and Lillian Ochi Siu. Lena's siblings include Heinie, Buck, Cora Lou, William (Luckie), Kiliona, and Lillian, all of whom preceded her in death. Lena attended elementary school on Molokai, and then attended intermediate and high school at Kamehameha Schools in Honolulu. From 1956 to 1959 she attended Brigham Young University in Provo, Utah, achieving her dream of becoming an elementary school teacher in just three years by attending classes year around. In between her freshman and sophomore years she participated in the 1957 Miss Hawaii pageant as the reigning Miss Molokai, excelling in hula dancing. During her junior year she met David Robertson at BYU during a Hawaiian club tobogganing party behind Mt.Timpanogas. After a lengthy courtship they married in December 1958, and Lena put David through his final two years at BYU by teaching elementary school in Benjamin, Utah. In 1961 Lena and David moved to Richland, Washington where Lena taught elementary school at Lewis & Clark and Spalding schools and David worked for GE and later Battelle Northwest Laboratories.

In Richland they were blessed with six children: Steven (Nancy), Stuart(Jennifer), Bruce(Tiffany), Boyd(Michelle), Neal(Becky) and Laurie(Daniel), and 19 beautiful grandchildren. Lena's pride and joy are her children and grandchildren, and her value of education was carefully instilled in all of them. She is an incredible wife, mother, and grandmother.

Lena dedicated much of her time and talents to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, serving in many ward and stake leadership and teaching positions including the Primary, Young Women, and Relief Society. Lena particularly loved serving the primary children and the young women, where she put her teaching knowledge and skills and her testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ to good use. Lena has been a temple ordinance worker and office worker in the Columbia River Washington Temple since its dedication in 2001. She received great joy in serving in the House of the Lord. In 2005-2006 she and David served as senior couple missionaries in Hong Kong, China serving in the Victoria II Branch. There she became a surrogate mother to about 250 Filipino and Indonesian young women members of the church who were working as domestic helpers in Hong Kong. Lena will be remembered for her love of the Savior and His gospel. She will be remembered for her kind, happy, caring, sharing, loving personality and for her beautiful smile and sparkling eyes. Her life was a mission in service and a desire to bless the lives of those around her.

Funeral services will be held at 11:00 AM Saturday, July 17, 2010 at Thayer Stake Center, Richland. Visitation will be 7:00-9:00 PM Friday the 16th at Einan's Funeral Home.

LOST!!!!

We lost Lucas yesterday (Monday) in Home Depot while buying paint. I was at the paint counter with Abbey and I look up to see Jeff and Lea walking quickly back to me without Lucas - without saying a word, he shrugged his shoulders and went searching. They had been chasing around a display and Lucas switched directions, Jeff heard him do so and went backwards to look for him and he was gone. From where I was standing I could hear a faint cry, so I took off to find him. Told at least a half dozen employees - they sent out a code Adam and luckily I had remembered exactly what he was wearing and the red hair helps a lot...... There was this huge industrial fan on one aisle and this is where I could hear the crying, but couldn't find him. We searched all over the store and the store had every exit covered to make sure noone took him out. Almost in tears I let out a quiet plea for help. When I rounded the corner, I saw Jeff holding Lucas walking towards me. He had sat down in the aisle with the big fan, but was on the other side of a display and we couldn't see him. It was probably only 2 minutes, but it seemed like forever. I knew he hadn't left the store because I could still hear him crying. Hopefully he (Lucas) now understands why I freak out when he doesn't stay by me in stores.

So I learned a few things:

Although most men would love to be lost in Home Depot, it's not so much fun for a 4 year old or his parents

Take notice of what your kids are wearing - you may need to tell someone

Tell the front desk immediately!!!

It's okay to be a hovering mom

2 minutes is an ETERNITY when you can't find your child

Less tears were shed during this event than my talk, but the panic was still there

The Lord answered my urgent plea to find our boy.

I survived

I survived giving my first talk in church in the last 5 years. Jeff and I were asked a couple weeks ago to speak on July 11th. Of course, I wanted to run and hide and make vacation plans for the next 6 months to avoid giving a talk - maybe they would forget about us.....alas no plans were made and the talk was given. I did okay, until we go to church this morning. I wanted to bolt for the bathroom and I swear the chapel doors closing for the sacrament was the same sound of a prison door shutting on me. I was stuck and had no choice......I DID NOT inherit the public speaking gene that my dad has - apparently everyone else in my family took it and I got the leftovers which happens to be: crying mixed with some audible speaking....

I chose to take Abbey with me - mostly to give myself a distraction from standing in front of my peers. Also I wasn't sure if she would freak out that I was up there and she was still in her seat. So I held her the whole time, she was so good - didn't touch the microphone once. Although it wasn't a distraction for me, I still cried like a blubbering whale (and that was before I even got started.......). I hope she was at least a distraction for the congregation........maybe. :)

We spoke about "work and responsibility" - a good subject for us as we've been through a lot of changes in those areas - excessive work hours, unemployment, new job, work/life balance, etc.

As a side note, our "Enrichment" committee has been released and I am no longer in charge of that. Apparently, our ward and RS our now small enough there is no need for a committee to exsist. Sounds good to me. :) But I did get a new calling - it was a busy Sunday.....teaching CTR6B - which I think is Lea's class. Happy to do it - I love Primary except when we get to be in charge of sharing time......ugh. :)

Proof.....it does happen

HE CAN BE TAUGHT! Reading directions actually helps. :)

Did you notice anything missing that would have provoked such a deep interest in that instruction manual?!!

The faucet decided to leak and was leaving water all over the counter and under the sink - first time since we moved in that under the sink was actually clean....5 years of dust, cleaned up nicely in a puddle of water.

This happened on the same day as Lucas' party - you can't see the mess I had to leave behind from the pizza making because I was w/o a sink. Jeff is standing in just the right spot to hide it all. Plus there's everything we had to remove from under the sink so he could get to work.......what a day!

Several hours later and several trips to Home Depot (thank goodness it's just down the street!)..............We have this:

Love it! Way to go Jeff and thank you Scott for coming to help!!